March 11, 2015

Reacting To Suicide...

I don't know if I come across like it here, but I'm a highly emotional person. So when something happens in life I react hard, whether good or bad. So when people don't react to things, especially horrible things, I find it odd.

You're all probably wondering where this is coming from, well earlier today out of seemingly nowhere "Julia" blurts out that she is sorry for her outburst and is extremely upset. I wasn't even paying attention to her so I didn't even know what she was talking about. Then she proceeds to blurt out that she had gotten a phone call twenty minutes before that her friend killed herself and that they had been friends since Middle School. I tell her I'm sorry for her loss and then she says she needs to go to lunch. So I tell her to go, take her time and do what she has to do.

She leaves and I just sit there stunned with "Favorite Page #3" because we both don't know how to deal with what just happened. Mainly because we had heard her get a phone call twenty minutes before and saw no unusual reaction from her -- In the time between the phone call and her blurting out sorry she didn't behave any odder than she normally does.

So she goes on her hour lunch break and then comes back acting like nothing happened. She didn't even say anything to our other coworkers until they asked her how she was. Then she proceeded to tell them that she always knew that she'd get a phone call like that about this particular friend and that the friend had a degree in some kind of social work or therapy. The whole thing is just weird and my coworkers agree. "Emily" actually just came up to me and said she isn't acting like a good friend killed themself.

But yeah, I don't get any of this. I am so excitable, so if I would have gotten a phone call about any of my friends passing away I probably would have had a break down the minute I heard the news and would need to leave work because I wouldn't be able to handle dealing with people after finding out that kind of news. Also, if you knew you'd get a phone call like this one day wouldn't you try to help your friend?

I just don't know. I don't understand. Do any of you get her reaction or lack there of?


  1. I definitely don't understand that kind of reaction to a "good friend."

    I had a friend who committed suicide, and when I found out I was practically inconsolable for WEEKS.

    1. I'm so sorry about your friend. I would be inconsolable for weeks also.

      Apparently she was crying earlier today according to one of my coworkers but I still don't understand her lack of reaction yesterday.

  2. People process grief in different ways.

    I got a phone call that a friend of mine (that lived in a different state but I stayed close with) had committed suicide. The call came in when I was on a lunch break, just before I met a friend (that didn't know the guy who died) for lunch.

    I was shocked to say the least, but mostly in disbelief.

    I met the friend for lunch and apologized for being a little scattered since I just got the sad news that a friend passed away.

    But, for the rest of the day, I was normal at work.

    It wasn't till I got home that I began to process what happened and burst into tears.

    I still think of the friend often, and have a voicemail from him saved on my phone that I can't bring myself to delete. (It's been over 5 years since he died.)

    1. I'm so sorry about your friend.

      I guess I'm just so emotional that a lack of reaction is something I just don't get. And on top of that I really didn't understand when she said she always knew that she'd get a phone call about this particular friend killing them self. If you knew that your friend was that upset wouldn't you try to help them? It was odd how she was speaking about it and such.